I often turn small things into much larger problems than they need to be. I often overthink things, and the instant I’m given some information on something (but not the full picture), I tend to blow it a bit out of proportion and panic. 

For example, I just finished the first two classes in my Ph.D. program. In the final week, one of the professors linked to the Ph.D. handbook and mentioned that as we’re going through our classes, we should be looking at building our dissertation committee. Seems innocent enough, but instantly when I read that, I felt that I was behind. I had a general idea for my project, and no idea about the dissertation committee, how to form that, when it needed to be done, etc. After I had a brief panic attack, I reached out to the other professor (who had been really nice to me) with a load of questions. Was I behind? What did I do? Would she be on my committee?

She sent me a very nice email, and asked how close I was to taking my first dissertation class. Ummm…two years? Then she probably laughed before she responded, but she said she would meet with me and told me she was glad I was asking questions. 

Our meeting went really well, and she said that I did not need to stress over it, it was a ways away, but that it was good I was already thinking about it, and that yes, she would be on my committee (or even the chair, if I chose) as she really liked working with people like me. People who liked being ahead of schedule and not behind. 

I’m doing it again – working three different jobs, going back to school full time, and creating my own 4-H club, I’m finding that I keep overwhelming myself. Oh, and my violin student. And archery for 4-H starting in a couple of months. But I can’t really quit anything right now. But with my new class, it is more work than my other two combined were, and once I saw the syllabus, I bet you can’t guess what happened. Instant overwhelm – a text shot off to my husband and telling my parents that night. And for some reason, each one of them told me I could handle it. 

I tend to stress over little things, that aren’t so big of an issue, until I am fully overwhelmed. I think I did probably sign up to do too much, but I enjoy doing all of it. Although I think I may un-sign up for archery 4-H, probably not continue violin lessons after this semester, and next year, I don’t think I’ll continue my own 4-H club (more on that shortly). It’s something I have to work on – not letting something small that I don’t know the full information on overwhelm me instantly. 

“When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then thou knewest my path.” – Psalms 142:3a, King James Version

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